Updated: Feb 8
Hey there! It's Mouse.
Here we are on New Year's Eve 2020. It's been a long year and I'm pretty sure most of you, like me, thought it would never end. I feel like there's this message going around in social media and online, that once the year is over; things will go back to the way things were. I don't think it's that easy. We still have months to go before there is normalcy. It's wishful thinking to believe that after today; it will all bounce back. Now, it will help if there is widespread hope. For a good chunk of history, hope is what brought people together and created change. This, I believe, is what we should focus on.
Much has happened throughout the year, besides the obvious. I'm trying to think back on what I have gained and learned. Since quitting my job, I've built up my patience and lowered my stress. Sometimes, Clovis would irritate me; yet I can deal with it. I didn't think I would be able to get my patience back, yet like a sprout springing from the ground after a wildfire, it 'grew' back. Maybe good habits can never be stamped out for good.
My skills as a writer have grown, exponentially. My fear of starting too late in the game, is beginning to look like a silly thought. I've managed to publish two books this year, this is more than I have done in many years.
Game boy and I have managed not to be part of the statistics of people ending their relationship in divorce because of having to be stuck inside everyday. I'm not saying that there aren't any moments, yet we communicate so well and understand each other; that it all works out.
There is so much power behind communicating. And you might say, but I'm afraid to communicate how I feel. That's the time when you HAVE to do it. You swallow that fear and you blurt it out. It feels good to come clean. Don't forget to be open-minded because you'll need that to fix any problem.
I used to be in a semi-relationship with someone who was terrible at communicating. I say semi-relationship because it was mostly long distance. He would claim that he wanted to make things work, yet never once mentioned how he felt. I, on the other hand, let it all out. I just didn't understand the point in hiding it. Skipping to the end of the drama, I decided to let him go with no communication - no goodbyes, no reasons. A week ago, I got in contact with him and apologized for leaving without saying goodbye because I felt like I went against my belief in being an open and honest person. Of course, it backfired on me because he got upset that I was married. Yet, I cleared my conscious. It's like what Harry* said, men and women can't be friends. That's fine. I have a best friend in Game boy and I couldn't ask for anything more.
I'm not going to stress myself out in coming up with resolutions because one doesn't know what things will be like in the future. You can plan all you want and life has a funny way of changing them. There were many plans that were cancelled and changed this year. (I'm glad I got married the year before.)
I'll just make a loose checklist of things to do, if I get to do them, great, if not, so be it. Life is short to be overly strict on yourself.
Have yourself a wonderful and safe New Year's.
*this is from a movie. Hint: it's a romantic comedy.